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VIVA Life!
By Joyce
Bolaños
This
months’ riddle…
How do you celebrate Father’s Day and
Gay month at the same time? Well it is
easy actually, at least in my life. My
son’s godparents are gay men. Yes and it
is official. When Andy was born, in the
Virgin Islands I wanted his godparents
to be active in his life. I could not
think of better godparents than Joe and
Jose. My Peruvian “Archie Bunker” father
was dismayed ,”What about the madrina?”
“No madrina, dad, just godfathers,” I
replied. “!Hay Dios mio! Que
escandalo!”,he said.
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Aren’t
padrinos supposed to be your best
friends? Friends that you can trust?
Well, they are my best and trustworthy
friends and that’s it. I called the
synagogue and all the churches in St.
Thomas and they all very politely said
no. Then I called the Unitarians on the
nearby island of St. John and they said
yes! My son Andy’s “water ceremony” was
held in the gardens of the then Boynes
Hotel on top of Blackbeards Hill in St.
Thomas. Sam Boynes had turned the Danish
18th century home into a beautiful
historic bed and breakfast.
Andy is 10 years old and throughout the
years his godfathers have done what
godparents usually do. Remember his
birthday, holidays and taken him to sea
aquariums, Broadway shows (The Beauty
and the Beast), Spiderman at Radio City
Hall, Rockefeller Center during the
holidays and such. Last year Andy’s
father died . Myself and the children
were in St. Thomas making the
arrangements, I had sent all the people
that loved my children’s father
(Michael) an e-mail telling of his
demise. A few hours later I get a phone
call from my dear friends (compadres),
they were very sorry that they could not
be there for Andy as they were
vacationing in Argentina at the moment,
but as godfathers they let me know that
they were taking their responsibility as
godfathers seriously. Although they
could not replace Michael , Andy could
count on them always.
A year has passed since then and my
compadres have been true to their word,
Andy has many male father figures that
care and love him; Joe and Jose his
godfathers, Abuelo, Ash his 20 year old
brother, his uncles Daniel, Bachi and
Dan his soon to be step dad.
Life takes many turns and when one
thinks that one is alone in bringing up
a child that just lost his father; you
turn and you are completely surrounded
with men that have stepped up to the
challenge.
Happy Father’s Day and Happy Gay Pride
Month! It’s a double celebration in my
family!
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Joyce's Bio
Joyce
Bolaños has over 12 yrs management and program
development working for Louis Vuitton Malletier and
the St. Thomas-St. John Chamber of Commerce and
currently as the Co-Host of VIVA HARTFORD! A
Cultural, Arts and Entertainment Hartford Public
Access Television Show.
Joyce Bolaños was born in Peru. Her family moved to
St. Croix, U.S.Virgin Islands and eventually settled
in Guaynabo, Puerto Rico where they still live.
During her high school years Ms. Bolaños represented
Puerto Rico as a member of their National Fencing
Team and traveled extensively throughout the
Caribbean, South America and Europe in International
Fencing Competitions.
Ms. Bolanos commenced her studies at Muhlenberg
College in Allentown, Pennsylvania and graduated in
Political Science and Marketing from Interamerican
University in San Juan, Puerto Rico. After college
she took a year off and lived in Paris, France to
practice the sport of Fencing. Ms. Bolanos returned
to the islands and settled in St. Thomas, U.S.
Virgin Islands. She currently lives with her two
sons, Andres and Michael in West Hartford, CT.
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